Posted in Body & Being

A Year Later, I’m Still Learning to Rest

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Last year, I answered the prompt,Ā ā€œHow are you treating your body this month? What does your body need to feel better?ā€Ā by saying I needed rest, relaxation, better meals, better sleep, and more movement.

And honestly? If we’re doing a little annual progress report, I’d say… some things have changed. Some things absolutely have not.

I am definitely eating better meals this year, so go me! One point for personal growth.

Better sleep, though? Yeah. About that.

I’m not a side sleeper. I have never been a side sleeper. And despite spending this entire pregnancy being told that I should sleep on my side, I still hate it. My body is basically like,Ā ā€œOh, you want me to sleep in the position I have spent my entire life avoiding? While also being nine months pregnant? Fun.ā€

So better sleep is probably going to have to remain a future goal.

And really, the biggest thing my body needs right now to feel better is pretty simple:

I need to give birth.

According to the baby books, a lot of these aches and pains should start going away once the baby is actually outside of me. Of course, I’m sure they’ll be replaced by an entirely new collection of aches and pains because apparently motherhood comes with a complimentary subscription to Back Painā„¢.

But honestly? Fine.

I’ll take the newborn-induced exhaustion and whatever other fun little postpartum surprises are waiting for me if it means I can stop carrying an entire person around in my abdomen.

The funny thing is, though, throughout this entire pregnancy, I really have been taking better care of my body. Since finding out I was pregnant, I’ve been much more aware of when I need to slow down, rest, eat something decent, or just generally stop expecting myself to function like a normal human when I am, in fact, growing another human.

When I was staying with my parents, I was actually pretty good at relaxing. Everything outside of the little bubble of me, my parents, and their dog stressed me out, but as long as I was home with them, I was fine. I could settle into that little bubble and just… be.

Now I’m back in California and without that safety net, I know it would be really easy to fall back into my usual habits of constantly doing something, worrying about something, or convincing myself that I should be doing more.

So I’m going to have to force myself to keep relaxing.

NotĀ ā€œI’ll relax after I finish this one thing.ā€

NotĀ ā€œI’ll rest once everything is taken care of.ā€

NotĀ ā€œI’ll just quickly do this first.ā€

Actually. Relax.

Because if there is one thing pregnancy has taught me, it’s that my body is going to do what it needs to do whether I have a five-point productivity plan for the day or not.

And maybe that’s the real answer to this year’s prompt.

My body needs good food. It needs movement when I’m able. It definitely needs better sleep, although we’ll circle back to that one after the baby arrives.

But more than anything, my body needs me to stop treating rest like something I have to earn.

So, for the rest of this pregnancy and hopefully beyond, I’m going to try to be a little gentler with myself.

Even if my body is currently shaped like a tired little question mark.

Posted in Body & Being

The Postpartum Tradition I Want to Try

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I genuinely can’t remember if I’ve already talked about this, so if I have, congratulations: you’re getting the SomePunnyBunny repost nobody asked for.

I’ve been looking into the 40-day postpartum recovery tradition, sometimes calledĀ la cuarentena. The basic idea isĀ rest, warmth, nourishment, and community—Mom stays home, avoids strenuous activity, eats nourishing foods, and if possible lets family take care of the cooking and cleaning while she focuses on recovering and bonding with the baby.

The more I learn about it, the more I think, honestly… I kind of want that.

The first time I heard about it, I honestly didn’t really understand it. My parents had mentioned it but my mom only got to stay home a month postpartum. And aside from my parents, nobody I know has really done this, so I started looking into it.

And honestly? I kind of want to try it.

Now, before anyone thinks I’m planning to survive exclusively on chicken soup and chamomile tea for 40 days, no. I will absolutely be eating other food. I just want to make a conscious effort to eat a lot of warm, nourishing food during those first few weeks.

Which actually works out pretty well considering this baby is supposed to show up at the end of September.

I know some of the reasoning behind these traditions isn’t necessarily backed by modern scientific evidence. My friends have reminded me that eating soup and drinking tea isn’t some medically proven postpartum recovery plan.

And they might be right.

But I also don’t really see the harm in trying something that feels comforting, nourishing, and culturally meaningful to me.

And if eating soup and drinking tea works well enough when I’m sick why won’t it work post pregnancy?Ā 

You have to think about what your body just went through. Pregnancy requires a ridiculous amount of nutrients and energy, and then you give birth and suddenly your body is recovering while also trying to figure out hormones, healing, sleep deprivation, and potentially producing breast milk.

I like the idea of giving my body warm, homemade, nutrient-dense food while it’s doing all of that.

And when I say soup, I don’t mean opening a can of chicken noodle soup and calling it a day.

I meanĀ homemade postpartum soup.

A lot of the postpartum food traditions I’ve been reading about recommend things likeĀ caldo de polloĀ (chicken soup),Ā caldo de resĀ (beef soup), atole, oatmeal, herbal teas like chamomile, and generally avoiding really greasy or heavy foods.

And honestly, some of that sounds pretty good to me.

I also keep seeing people talk about focusing on protein and nutrient-dense foods postpartum, which makes sense to me. I’m not expecting a magical soup or a lactation cookie to suddenly fix everything. I just want to eat food that actually gives my body something useful.

My friend has very kindly offered to help make food for me, which I appreciate SO much. Unfortunately, she is not really a soup person.

So now I have to figure out what exactly to ask her to make because I do not want to be ungrateful, and I will happily accept basically any help I can get.

But I’m also planning on batch-making a bunch of soup and freezing it as soon as I get to California.

Because I want to try this.

Maybe I’ll make it the full 40 days.

Maybe I’ll make it 30.

Maybe I’ll make it 20 and decide I am absolutely sick of soup and need a cheeseburger.

I don’t know.

But I want to give myself the opportunity to try.

And I know other people have had babies without doing any of this. I know some people are going to read this and think it sounds silly. Maybe it is. Maybe some of these traditions really are just old wives’ tales.

But I don’t think everything has to be scientifically proven before I’m allowed to try it.

If something makes me feel cared for, helps me prioritize nutrition, gives me something comforting to look forward to, and doesn’t hurt me, why not?

This is also where I’m realizing that I’m going to have to start getting comfortable telling peopleĀ no.

Because everyone is going to have an opinion.

My friends have opinions. My family has opinions. People online have opinions. People who have had five kids are going to tell me what worked for them. Lactation people are going to tell me what worked for them. Random women at the grocery store will probably have opinions.

And I can listen to all of it.

But listening doesn’t mean I have to do it.

This is my first pregnancy. I’m figuring things out as I go. I’m going to research things, listen to people I trust, talk to my doctors, and then make my own decisions.

Maybe some things I try will work.

Maybe some things won’t.

Maybe I’ll get three days into my beautiful postpartum soup tradition and order Taco Bell.

Honestly, anything is possible.

But I do want to give myself permission to do this my way.

Because if I don’t start learning how to set those boundaries now, I’m going to have a very hard time raising my kid the way I want to raise them.

Posted in Body & Being

Ending August Off With a Bang

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So we are ending August off with a bang.

I haven’t confirmed anything yet, but I think I may have a fungal infection, which apparently is pretty common during pregnancy. And if you’ve had one before, pregnancy can apparently make it worse. So I don’t really know where I stand with that yet, but I do know that lately I’ve been having a lot of dry, flaky patches popping up on my skin.

And when I say dry, I meanĀ DRY.

No matter how much moisturizer I put on them, they stay dry and flaky. There’s also some skin discoloration, and no matter how much I scrub these areas in the shower, they still look exactly the same.

At this point, that can only mean one thing: something is going on.

I think I’ve already posted about how I haven’t really been able to visit a doctor while I’ve been here, and of course, I didn’t think to schedule an appointment while I was in California because apparently remembering basic things is too much to ask of me.

But dry, flaky skin combined with changes in skin color can be a symptom ofĀ tinea versicolor, which is a common, non-contagious fungal infection caused by an overgrowth of yeast on the surface of the skin. That doesn’t necessarily mean that’s what I have, but considering what my skin has been doing lately, it’s definitely something I want to have checked out.

The good news is I’ll be going back to California in about 10 days, so I’m going to schedule a doctor’s appointment for when I get back and hopefully get an actual answer instead of playing dermatologist with Google.

Until then, I’m going to try a few things at home and see if anything helps.

So for now, I’m off to buy Nizoral shampoo because apparently a LOT of people online recommend it for this. Hopefully it helps, but either way, I’m definitely going to have this checked out once I’m back in California.

Because apparently pregnancy wasn’t already giving me enough things to keep track of. Now my skin has decided it wants to join the party.