personal goals – Some Punny Bunny

The Version of Me I Want to Bring Into Motherhood

Posted on September 7, 2026September 6, 2026 by Eryn 🐰

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A few days ago, one of my daily prompts was: “What year would you relive?”

And believe it or not, I didn’t say 2022.

I said 2015.

2015 was the beginning of my senior year of high school, and then I turned 18. I had energy. I had basically no responsibilities. My biggest problems felt so ridiculously small compared to the things I worry about now.

I was taking yoga classes and photography classes. I was taking a few community college classes, but nothing too serious. I was figuring myself out and just… existing.

I was 18.

Of course I would relive that year.

2022 was actually a very close second.

And I think that’s what got me thinking about it.

Because 2022 wasn’t that long ago, but when I started looking through my old Instagram and camera roll, it felt like I was looking at a completely different version of myself.

I didn’t originally sit down thinking, Let me compare 2022 SomePunnyBunny to 2026 SomePunnyBunny.

It started because I was trying to remember why I picked 2022 as my second choice.

Then I found an old SomePunnyBunny Reel from November 2022.

Which led me to more old Reels.

Which led me to TikTok.

Which led me to Instagram.

Which led me to my camera roll.

And suddenly I was looking at 2022 me.

And what surprised me wasn’t necessarily how different I looked.

It was how happy I looked.

And the funny thing is, when I look at myself now, I think I look happy too.

Just differently.

I Was Doing A Lot to Make Myself Happy

In 2022, I was doing a lot to make myself happy.

I had restarted my weight-loss journey. I was posting recipes constantly. I was keeping up with a mostly consistent book club on the blog. I had started getting more into Reels and TikTok, and I was actually posting on both.

I was creating.

I was experimenting.

I was trying things.

I was figuring out what I wanted SomePunnyBunny to be.

And I was also taking care of myself in ways that, looking back, I realize I’ve slowly let slip through the cracks.

My skincare routine.

Doing my hair.

Doing my makeup.

Putting together an outfit just because I wanted to feel cute.

Taking pictures of myself.

There was something about 2022 me that was very intentional about making herself feel good.

And honestly, I think I was mentally in a pretty good place, too.

Not perfect. Definitely not perfect.

But happy.

Then I look at 2026 me.

And I’m happy too.

Just in a completely different way.

2026 Is a Different Kind of Happy

This year has been chaotic.

I’ve been stressed. I’ve cried. I’ve had emotions that seem to change by the hour. I’ve spent basically the entire year pregnant, so I’m willing to blame at least some of that emotional whiplash on the hormones.

But underneath all of that, I’ve actually been pretty okay.

And at the end of this year, I’m going to welcome my child into the world.

I would never trade that.

There isn’t a part of me looking back at 2022 thinking, I wish I could have that life instead.

I don’t.

I want this year.

I want my baby.

I want the life I’m building now.

But looking through those old pictures did make me realize something:

I miss some of the ways I used to love myself.

Somewhere along the way, the little things I used to do for myself started falling through the cracks.

The skincare routine became something I did when I remembered.

Doing my hair became something I did when I absolutely had to.

Makeup became an occasional event.

My weight-loss journey stopped being a priority.

Taking pictures just because I felt cute became less common.

And I don’t think any of those things are inherently important.

I don’t think a woman needs to wear makeup, lose weight, have perfect hair, or follow a ten-step skincare routine to be happy or beautiful.

That’s not what I’m saying.

What I miss is the intention behind it.

2022 me was making an effort to make herself happy.

And I want that part of her back.

I Don’t Want to Go Back. I Just Want to Bring Some of Her With Me.

Obviously, it’s going to look different now.

I’m about to have a baby.

I know there are going to be days when showering is an accomplishment. There will probably be days when the skincare routine is absolutely not happening. There will be days when my hair is in a messy bun for the third day in a row and I haven’t put on makeup in weeks.

And that’s okay.

I’m not going into motherhood expecting myself to immediately bounce back and become some perfectly put-together version of myself.

That sounds exhausting just thinking about it.

But I also don’t want to completely disappear into motherhood.

I want to remember that I’m still a person, too.

I still deserve to do things that make me feel good.

I still deserve to take care of myself.

I still deserve to feel pretty.

I still deserve hobbies.

I still deserve to create.

I still deserve to have goals that have nothing to do with being someone’s mom.

And yes, I’m probably going to have to figure out how to do all of that around a baby.

That will be a whole new adventure.

Because if 2022 taught me anything, it’s that taking care of yourself isn’t always about the big things.

Sometimes it’s washing your face before bed.

Sometimes it’s doing your hair because you feel like it.

Sometimes it’s putting on lipstick just to go to Target.

Sometimes it’s making a recipe you’ve been wanting to try.

Sometimes it’s sitting down with a book.

Sometimes it’s taking a ridiculous amount of pictures because you feel cute that day.

Sometimes it’s making a TikTok for absolutely no reason.

Sometimes it’s just doing something because you want to, not because somebody else needs you to.

I’m Still Becoming Her

I think that’s what this little trip down memory lane was really about.

It wasn’t me wishing I could go back to 2022.

It was me remembering a version of myself who knew how to make herself happy.

And I want to learn how to do that again.

Not exactly the same way.

Not with the same goals.

Not with the same body, schedule, responsibilities, or life.

But with the same self-love.

Because I was happy in 2022.

I’m happy in 2026.

And I don’t think one version of me has to win.

I can miss the girl who spent more time doing her hair and makeup while still being incredibly grateful for the woman who is about to become a mother.

I can want to bring back my skincare routine without wanting my old life back.

I can want to feel confident in my body without making my body something I have to constantly fix.

I can have a baby and still have hobbies.

I can be a mom and still be SomePunnyBunny.

I can take care of everyone else and remember to take care of myself, too.

And hopefully, when I look back at 2026 years from now, I won’t just remember that this was the year I became a mother.

I’ll remember that this was also the year I started learning how to take care of myself again.

Maybe not perfectly.

Maybe not consistently.

Maybe sometimes the skincare routine will consist of washing my face at 2 a.m. while holding a baby.

But I’ll try.

Because I don’t want to become the version of myself who only takes care of herself when she has time.

I want to become the version of myself who understands that she deserves some of that time, too.

And if 2022 me can teach 2026 me anything, maybe that’s it.

Take care of yourself.

Make yourself happy.

Take the damn picture.

Do your hair.

Put on the lipstick.

Read the book.

Make the recipe.

Post the TikTok.

And don’t wait until you have your whole life figured out to enjoy the person you’re becoming.

Because apparently, I’m still becoming her.

Just in a completely different way.

And that’s okay.

I’m happy then. I’m happy now. It just looks different.

Monthly Muses

Welcome to September

Posted on September 1, 2026September 1, 2026 by Eryn 🐰

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September 1st has always been important to me.

Not in the normal “new month, new goals” kind of way. I have always treated September 1st like it was an event.

If you know me, you probably know where this comes from.

I used to be a huge Harry Potter fan, and September 1st was obviously the day. In the books, this was the day the kids packed their trunks, said goodbye to their parents, and boarded the Hogwarts Express from Platform 9¾. So naturally, every September 1st felt a little magical.

At one point, I even wrote about September 1st through the lens of Heathers, because the opening of “Beautiful” starts with Veronica saying, “Dear Diary, September 1st,” and apparently that was enough for my brain to decide that September 1st needed its own little annual ceremony.

So for years, September 1st has been one of those dates that just means something to me.

It used to be the beginning of a new school year, but now kids go to school in August. It’s the unofficial beginning of fall in my brain. It’s Hogwarts Express day. It’s Heathers day. It’s the point where summer starts feeling like it’s officially on its way out and the rest of the year suddenly feels very real.

And usually, September 1st means I get to sit down and write some sort of dramatic little reflection about the month ahead.

Except this year, I have a slightly bigger problem.

It’s a new month, a new day, and somehow we are officially in the month where this baby could decide to show up at literally any point.

And honestly, I really thought that by the time September got here, I would be completely done talking about pregnancy.

I thought between June and September I would have discussed everything baby-related. I figured three months would be plenty of time to get it all out of my system. The pregnancy, the fears, the excitement, the things I didn’t expect, the things that stressed me out, the things that made me laugh, the things I was looking forward to, and all of the random thoughts that have been taking up space in my brain.

I thought by September I would have nothing left to say.

Apparently, I was very wrong.

Because somehow it is September 1st and I still have things I haven’t talked about.

So I guess this is officially the countdown now. Unfortunately for me, it’s a very literal countdown because baby girl could come any day. I don’t know if I have a few weeks left or if she could decide tomorrow is the day, which makes planning anything slightly difficult.

I do want to address some of the things I haven’t talked about yet, and hopefully I can get some of them out before baby girl gets here. But for now, I’m trying to keep things loose.

I don’t want to make some elaborate content calendar where I have to write about a specific topic on a specific day when I don’t even know what the next few weeks are going to look like.

At this point, I have approximately 4 things planned:

Get to California.
Get settled enough to function.
Have a baby.
Don’t die in labor.

That’s it. That’s the plan.

And honestly, the closer we get to the end of this year, the more I keep thinking about my word of the year: alignment.

Because do I even understand what alignment means for me anymore?

At the beginning of the year, I thought I did. I had an idea of where I wanted my life to go and what I thought getting into alignment with that life would look like.

And then this year happened.

Plans changed. Timelines changed. Things I thought would happen didn’t happen, and things I stopped planning for happened anyway.

So now I’m sitting here in September, pregnant, still figuring out where I’m going to be, waiting for a baby who could completely change the timeline again, and wondering if I actually understand the word I chose for this year.

Maybe alignment doesn’t mean everything goes according to plan.

Maybe it’s learning how to move forward when the plan changes.

Maybe it’s accepting that sometimes you can do everything you thought you were supposed to do and still end up somewhere completely different.

Or maybe I will finally figure out what I meant by alignment sometime between now and December.

For now, I’m just welcoming September, trying to enjoy whatever time I have left before baby girl gets here, and giving myself permission to keep things loose.

I still have things to say.

I just don’t know how much time I have left to say them before this baby decides she’s ready to make her entrance.

Lifestyle

Mid-Year Check-In: Maybe This Is What Alignment Actually Looks Like

Posted on July 2, 2026 by Eryn 🐰

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At the beginning of this year, I chose alignment as my word of the year.

I wrote that I used to think balance meant doing everything all at once. Keeping every plate spinning. Being productive all the time. But I realized balance is quieter than that. It’s about doing the right things at the right time.

I also talked about living in seasons. At the time, I thought seasons were an alternative to balance.

Now, halfway through the year, I think they’re the same thing.

And life has made sure I learned that lesson.

If you had told January me that by July I’d be seven months pregnant, less than three months away from meeting my daughter, packing up a house, preparing to move, and completely rearranging my life, I probably would’ve laughed.

That wasn’t on my vision board.

Neither was putting school on pause.

Neither was stepping away from work.

Neither was preparing to move.

At the beginning of the year, Hector and I were renting a house with a roommate. Now we’re packing up our lives and preparing for one of the biggest transitions we’ve ever faced.

For a little while, we’ll actually be living in separate states while we figure out this next chapter. If you’ve been following along, you already know the circumstances behind that decision, but that doesn’t make it any less emotional. It’s not how either of us imagined spending the final stretch of my pregnancy, but it’s the decision that makes the most sense for our family right now.

Between packing boxes, preparing for a baby who’s due in September, attending what feels like endless doctor’s appointments, and trying to process how much life can change in just six months, I’ve had to accept that I simply can’t do everything.

And maybe that’s the point.

Life rarely asks if your plans are convenient.

It just changes.

This year has looked nothing like I expected, and honestly, there have been moments where I’ve felt guilty about that. Guilty that I haven’t been reading as much. Guilty that I’m not checking goals off as quickly as I’d hoped. Guilty that so much of my energy has gone toward simply making it through the day.

But then I remembered something I wrote back in January.

Alignment means letting your priorities match the season you’re actually in.

Well…

This season isn’t about hustle.

It’s about growing a human.

It’s about preparing for motherhood.

It’s about creating a home where our daughter will take her first nap, celebrate her first holidays, and make memories we’ll tell her about years from now.

It’s about taking care of my body, even on the days when pregnancy feels exhausting. It’s about accepting that rest is productive when your body is literally building another person.

As for those ten goals I set…

Well…

I’ve completed exactly zero of them.

Not one.

And surprisingly?

I’m okay with that.

I started Iron Flame back in January and… I’m still reading it. Mommy brain is real, and every time I pick it up, I feel like I have to reread the last chapter because I’ve forgotten what happened. At this point, I think I’ve spent more time carrying the book around than actually reading it.

Running a 5K while pregnant was obviously never going to happen.

Working out three times a week turned into, “Did I remember to take my prenatal vitamin today?”

Trying twenty new recipes sounded so exciting in January. Then pregnancy food aversions hit, and suddenly half the foods I normally loved made me nauseous. Add in my gestational diabetes diagnosis—which I’ve already ranted about on this blog—and experimenting in the kitchen became the last thing I wanted to do.

The passport?

Still don’t have one.

The tattoo?

That can wait until after pregnancy.

The hikes, the spa days, the giant canvas painting…

None of them happened.

A few months ago, I think I would’ve looked at this list and called the year a failure.

Now?

I don’t.

Because the goals I actually accomplished were never on that list.

I’ve grown a healthy little girl for seven months.

I’ve made it through countless appointments, blood sugar checks, and more medical advice than I ever thought I’d receive in one year.

I’ve advocated for myself when something didn’t feel right.

I’ve prepared for a move during one of the biggest life transitions I’ve ever experienced.

I’ve made difficult decisions for my family, even when they weren’t the decisions I originally wanted to make.

None of those things can be checked off in a resolutions list.

But they’re still accomplishments.

Maybe even bigger ones than the goals I wrote down in January.

At the start of the year, I said this wasn’t about a fresh start. It was about a continuation—a softer, more honest one.

I don’t think I fully understood what I meant back then.

I do now.

Alignment isn’t about having everything under control.

It’s about giving yourself permission to change when life changes.

The second half of 2026 is going to ask even more of me than the first.

I’ll become a mom.

We’ll settle into a new home.

Hector and I will hopefully be back in the same state after this temporary season apart.

None of it will be easy.

But for the first time in a long time, I don’t feel like I’m fighting the season I’m in.

I’m just trying to live it well.

And I think that’s exactly what alignment was trying to teach me all along.

Lifestyle

April Renewal: Join My 30-Day Blogging Challenge

Posted on March 25, 2026 by Eryn 🐰

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April is almost here, and honestly? I’m buzzing. Like, full-on spring bee buzzing in a flower field buzzing. This April, I’m going all in: 30 posts for 30 days on both Instagram and the blog. After trying and failing to post all 31 days in October, December, and January, it’s April’s turn—and I am READY. No holding back. No half-hearted attempts. Just pure, unfiltered, unapologetic spring energy.

I’ve been feeling extra inspired by VEDA (Vlog Every Day of April), which basically feels like a personal invitation to go wild with creativity. And wild I shall go. Expect everything from Earth Day initiatives (because yes, saving the planet is chic, and we’re doing it in style) to fresh seasonal recipes that taste like sunshine in a bowl, to full-on lifestyle resets that will leave you feeling lighter, brighter, and maybe a little obsessed with the little joys that make spring spring.

Cozy mornings? Check. Journaling with your favorite warm drink in hand? Check. Yoga flows that make you feel like your body is remembering how to breathe again? Double check. Honestly, April feels like that perfect mix of new notebook energy and deeply personal reflection energy, and I want to share all of it with you.

Spring in the Bible is all about renewal, resurrection, and God’s faithfulness to bring new life after a long winter. And let’s be real—after the last few months (or years, honestly), who couldn’t use a little resurrection? That energy of new beginnings is exactly what I’m chasing this month: new ideas, fresh perspectives, and tiny, bright reminders that growth isn’t always dramatic, but it is always worth celebrating.

And here’s the thing—I want this upcoming month to feel like more than just posts. I want it to feel like a community. Like we’re all sipping tea together, swapping messy life confessions, laughing at ridiculous mistakes, trying new recipes that may or may not flop, and ultimately celebrating all the weird, wonderful ways we grow. Because spring isn’t just about flowers—it’s about showing up, even when it feels messy or uncertain, and trusting that life has a way of bringing beauty out of the chaos.

So what can you expect from me this April? Honestly, a little bit of everything: the cozy, the cute, the chaotic, the heartfelt, and maybe even some things that are totally extra (because, hi, I’m not above it). Think mornings with sunlight spilling onto your kitchen counter while sourdough rises, afternoons of journaling while your favorite playlist softly hums in the background, evenings spent reflecting and dreaming about the next chapter of your life.

This April, I want us to bloom together. To chase that feeling of new beginnings with reckless curiosity. To celebrate the small wins as much as the big ones. To remember that God’s faithfulness doesn’t take breaks—it’s quietly, beautifully present in every little step of our journey, even the ones that feel tiny or messy or confusing.

So grab your favorite cup of tea, dust off that journal, and let’s lean into this month with open hearts, open minds, and maybe a little bit of drama—because why not? April is here, it’s bright, it’s messy, it’s hopeful, and it’s ours. Let’s bloom.

Lifestyle

Reclaiming Myself in 2026

Posted on February 2, 2026February 3, 2026 by Eryn 🐰

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Time has a funny way of changing us, sometimes without us even realizing it. Looking back on 2025, I see a version of myself that feels distant—like a person I didn’t recognize or agree with. In 2018 or even 2020, the choices I made last year would have seemed impossible to me. I forced myself to follow a path I thought I should take, not the one I wantedto take. I tried to fit into a box that wasn’t mine, desperately playing “keeping up with the Joneses,” thinking that’s what I was supposed to do.

But what do I have to show for it? Not much. In fact, the only decision from 2025 that I don’t regret was getting my dogs. They’ve been my only source of comfort and joy in a year that otherwise felt like a series of wrong turns.

And now here I am, in 2026, wanting to reclaim myself—the real me that I’ve buried under other people’s expectations and my own fears. I spent the past three years forgetting why I was struggling or why I made certain choices. I gave up on school, something I once valued, because I was too focused on a future I thought I had to portray to kids I haven’t even had yet. I was so obsessed with the wrong choices that I stopped helping the only person who mattered in all this: me.

There’s a quote I love by Steve Harvey: “If you’re already in hell, why stay?” I don’t even know if that’s his original line, but it resonates with me. I’ve been letting myself stay in my own version of hell, trapped by past choices and self-imposed expectations. But it’s time to walk away from that. I’m not staying in this place anymore. I’ve spent too long living for the wrong things and the wrong people.

In 2026, I’m focusing on reclaiming my happiness, one step at a time. It won’t be easy, but it’s necessary. Time changes us, yes. But it also offers the opportunity to change back—to remember who we were before the world tried to tell us who we should be.

A quick note to self, though: I know I say this every year. I know the pattern. Usually, I wait until the year’s end, trying to build myself back up, focusing on my relationship with Hector. But this time, things are different. I’m prioritizing me. I’m done waiting for others to step in and build me up. I’ve already signed myself up for workshops and clubs this year, and I’m determined to spend this year loving myself in ways I’ve neglected.

Instead of waiting for someone to give me what I deserve, I’m giving it to myself. I’m not gonna ask for monthly dates from a person who’s not going to give them to me—I’m taking myself out on monthly dates. I’m learning to be the one I’ve always needed.

This isn’t a dig at Hector. We are currently at different stages in our lives, each with different wants and needs. While we both want the same things in the long run, our timelines just aren’t aligned right now, and that’s okay. Sometimes, life’s timing doesn’t match our expectations, but it doesn’t mean we’re not on the same path—it just means we’re walking at different paces. I’m focusing on myself, but that doesn’t change the love and respect I have for him, or the shared goals we’re both working towards.

So here’s to finding my way back, and to a making choices that align with who I truly am. Here’s to prioritizing me—because at the end of the day, that’s the only choice I’ll never regret.

Body & Being

I walked a 5K, and honestly? It wasn’t that bad.

Posted on January 26, 2026February 2, 2026 by Eryn 🐰

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Let me be clear—I didn’t run. I didn’t train. I didn’t have some dramatic fitness montage beforehand. I just showed up, put one foot in front of the other, and walked the whole thing. And somehow, the world did not end.

The first mile felt suspiciously easy, which immediately made me nervous. The second mile was when my legs started asking questions and my brain started negotiating. By the third mile, I was fully committed out of spite. I had come too far to quit, and turning around felt more embarrassing than just finishing.

Crossing the finish line felt oddly satisfying. Not life-changing, not spiritual—but solid. I did something I wasn’t sure I wanted to do, and it turns out I was capable the whole time.

Lifestyle

My 2026 Word of the Year and Resolutions

Posted on January 2, 2026 by Eryn 🐰

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My word for 2026 is: Alignment.

I used to think balance meant doing all the things, all the time—keeping every plate spinning and calling it success. But now I know balance is quieter than that. It’s about doing the right things, at the right time.

For a long time, I talked about living in seasons as an alternative to balance. Now I see it differently. Operating in seasons isn’t avoiding balance—it’s the gateway to it. It’s the pathway to peace.

Alignment, for me, means letting my energy, priorities, and capacity match the season I’m actually in. It’s about listening instead of forcing, choosing what fits instead of what simply looks good, and trusting that not everything needs my attention all at once.

Alignment is living with ease—allowing life’s current to guide me and trusting that when I follow my soul, things unfold the way they’re meant to.

In 2026, I’m choosing alignment over overwhelm. Presence over pressure. And peace over perfection.

And honestly? I need that—because I ended 2025… not great.

I’m not talking to Hector’s family. I’ve drifted from a few friends. I didn’t go to my mom’s for Christmas. Most of December I was sick, stuck inside, watching the days blur together instead of actually living them.

I ended up in the hospital recently, hoping for answers about what’s been going on with me now—and instead I got a full highlight reel of everything else. Pre-diabetic. Low iron (which I already knew). Low vitamin D (no surprise when I barely leave the house). Six medications. A lot of charts, a lot of numbers, and the very humbling realization that I haven’t really been showing up for my health the way I should.

I’m not working right now, and I won’t be going back to school in February either. That sentence still feels strange to type. It wasn’t the plan. None of this was.

But this isn’t me giving up. This is me pausing.

I want 2026 to be better—not in a “new year, new me” way, but in a quieter, more realistic way. The kind of better that looks like taking my meds, going outside, keeping appointments, choosing rest without guilt, and rebuilding slowly instead of burning myself out trying to fix everything at once.

Last year I made 25 resolutions and completed six of them. And honestly? Six is more than zero. So this year I’m not dragging all 19 unfinished goals with me like emotional carry-on luggage. I’m choosing ten. Just ten. The ones that still matter. The ones that feel possible. The ones that support the version of me who is tired—but trying.

This isn’t a fresh start.
It’s a continuation.
A softer one.
A more honest one.

Read 30 books
Run a 5K
Write 100 blog posts
Get a tattoo
Get my passport
Paint on a large canvas
Try 20 new recipes
Go hiking once a month
Schedule one spa day each month
Work out three times a week

That’s it. Ten goals for a year that’s about choosing what fits, honoring the season I’m in, and building a life that feels steady, creative, and kind to me.

Lifestyle

September Reflections: My Goals and What This Month Means

Posted on September 2, 2025 by Eryn 🐰

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Let’s jump right in! I’m super excited to blend my first two prompts into a fun little makeup post today. This time, I’m thinking of taking a more casual approach, like a microblogging vibe. Last time I did a challenge like this, I limited myself to 100 words or so, but now I feel inspired to give myself a bit more space to share my thoughts, aiming for 250 words max. I want to keep it light and enjoyable, so I’ll share my posts in whatever order I feel like.

September has always brought a sense of nostalgia for me; it used to mean that the Hogwarts Express was leaving. I’ve already expressed my feelings about J.K. Rowling and Harry Potter, and while I try to separate the two, it’s a bit complicated, so please don’t come for me! Now, September signifies the arrival of beautiful autumn colors, cozy evenings at home with a nice cup of cider and tea, and pumpkin spice everything. I love being able to wear sweaters again and snuggle under a blanket on the couch with a good book. While I adore autumn, as an adult, it sometimes feels like just another month slipping by.

This month, I don’t have many goals:

Prepare all the decorations for the wedding and decide which DIY projects I want to start.
Figure out my wedding nails. I have a design in mind, but I’m torn between coffin nails and almond nails; coffin nails would fit the theme better but I always wear almond nails.
Finish two full tumblers of water every day.
Stick to my skincare routine every night.
Read my devotion first thing in the morning at least five days a week.
Get more involved on campus and help Hector get involved now that he’s attending.
Choose which universities I want to apply toApplications start in October, and I want to get that done as soon as possible.

Body & Being

Running on Empty

Posted on August 3, 2025August 3, 2025 by Eryn 🐰

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Exactly one month ago, I declared—loudly and confidently—that I was going to train for a 5K.

It was supposed to be a thing. A routine. A little plotline for my summer. The start of a new arc where I was going to become that girl—disciplined, glowy, hydrated, jogging through the neighborhood at sunrise while vibing to a playlist called “5K Slay.”

But instead?

Here’s what actually happened:

A few half-hearted walks.
A couple of nights doom-scrolling beginner runner TikTok instead of going to bed.
Multiple “this is the week I start” pep talks… followed by zero actual running.

And then—nothing.

Just regular life. And depression.

And the quiet, constant ache of wanting to want things—but not quite being able to push myself through the fog.

There’s a word I’m looking for here—not motivation, not even discipline exactly, but that thing that lets you make yourself do something even when you don’t feel like it. The internal push. The engine. The whatever-it-is that people seem to be born with or build or brute-force into their bones.

I think I lost mine somewhere between burnout, sadness, and too many “maybe tomorrow” mornings.

To be clear, this wasn’t just a case of “I got busy.”

This was a full-body shutdown.

That fuzzy, foggy, gently-doomed feeling where everything is technically fine but somehow still feels like a cursed Sims save file.

And now it’s August.

Which hasn’t brought peace or renewal or momentum—but rather, a soft, creeping sense of doom.

Like I’m standing in the middle of a slow, sad montage where nothing is exactly wrong, but everything still feels like it’s unraveling. Not dramatically. Just… quietly. Just enough to make everything feel heavy.

I’m not trying to be dramatic—okay, maybe a little—but this month already feels like Little Miss Sunshine: emotionally unstable, slightly chaotic, and featuring an ensemble cast of tired people just trying their best. Everyone’s hanging on by a thread, the van won’t start without a push, and no one really knows what’s happening—but we’re still rolling forward, somehow. Just picture me in the metaphorical backseat, wearing heart-shaped sunglasses and trying to stay hopeful while everything teeters between disaster and weird, scrappy triumph.

To be fair, it’s not just me spiraling.

Hector’s been going through it too.

He’s still job hunting, and the stress of that alone is enough. But add to that the fact that his car was completely totaled (he’s okay, thankfully—the car is not), and we’re officially in “when it rains, it pours” territory.

He did get a job lead and passed the drug test (yay!).

But then… they found protein in his urine.

Which can mean kidney disease.

Which, for a guy who’s had kidney stones since he was a kid, is more than a little terrifying.

Naturally, I’ve been down a 1 a.m. rabbit hole Googling “can kidney stones cause kidney disease” like I’m studying for the MCAT. Spoiler: the answer is somewhere between sometimes? and maybe not?—which is so comforting, thank you WebMD.

So yeah. I’m not running a 5K this month.

I’m running errands.

Running out of patience.

Running on iced coffee and borrowed serotonin.

But I’m still here.

Still wanting to become the version of me who set that goal.

Still trying to believe in her, even if she’s currently curled up under a blanket, Googling “how to runaway from your life.”

The 5K may happen.

Maybe August will calm the hell down.

Maybe I’ll start by just walking. Or stretching. Or drinking water like someone who has a plan.

For now, I’m letting this post be the progress report.

A soft check-in.

A quiet reminder that some months are for thriving, and some months are for surviving—and both are still valid.

Lifestyle

2025 Midyear Check-In: Progress in Real Time 💫

Posted on July 2, 2025July 3, 2025 by Eryn 🐰

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Hey there! Can you believe we’re already halfway through 2025? Time feels like it’s flying by, but sometimes, growing and changing feels like a slow dance.

At the start of the year, I made a few intentions and goals—not just your typical resolutions, but gentle reminders to take care of myself and embrace life a bit more intentionally, with resilience and joy. Here’s a peek at my Resilience Goals for this year:

– Practice mindfulness and soak in the present moment.

– Discover more about myself with a curious heart.

– Keep things in perspective and stay grounded.

– Treat self-care as a must, not a luxury.

– Look after both my physical and mental well-being.

– Express myself freely, playfully, and honestly.

I haven’t been flawless (who is, right?), but I’ve found small yet meaningful ways to weave these practices into my life. Sometimes, that just means journaling, and other times, it’s as simple as remembering to drink water and take a deep breath before reacting. Every bit counts!

Now, let’s talk about my lighthearted “2025 Bingo Card”—it’s a fun mix of real goals, whimsical dreams, and a sprinkle of chaos to keep things lively. Here’s how it’s shaping up so far:

✅ What I’ve Done (or am doing):

– Joined a book club – Technically, I started one myself. Power move!

– Reduced spending – Well, when everything gets pricey, that’s a win!

– Made some DIY vanilla syrup – Who knew I’d become a barista?

– Drinking more water – It’s a work in progress, but my water bottle is always nearby.

– Saving money – Kind of? Let’s say I’m giving it a solid effort!

🔄 What’s Still in Progress:

– Teaching Hector to dance – We’re both trying; it’s a fun journey!

– Getting my passport – It’s on my to-do list.

– Running a 5K – I downloaded a running app. Does that count?

– Writing 100 blogs – You’re reading one right now! We are at 57 blogs currently!!

– Restarting my YouTube channel – Stay tuned for that!

– Get a tattoo – Got some exciting design ideas brewing.

– Learning a new language – Slowly but surely, with Duolingo cheering me on. Do we still support Duolingo? I know they became like AI first, and I don’t know how I feel about that.

– Losing 60 pounds – Taking my time with kindness and respect for myself.

Here’s the truth: I can be a bit impatient. Like, “Why haven’t I transformed overnight just because I journaled a couple of times and drank water for three days?” levels of impatient.

I want everything to happen fast—the growth, the glow-up, the results—all of it! But here’s the lesson I keep bumping into: good things take time. Not everything needs to bloom in January, March, or even July. Some goals are like little seeds, quietly working underground where no one can see them, including me.

And while that’s tough, it’s so important. Flowers don’t rush; they bloom when they’re ready. Maybe it’s time for me to stop fussing about the soil and just keep watering, showing up, and trusting the process.

So, if you find yourself wondering, “Why isn’t it happening faster?” take a deep breath. You’re not behind—you’re just in the beautiful process of becoming. Yes, it can be frustratingly slow at times, but it’s so real, and absolutely worth it.

Here’s to soft discipline, fun goals, unfinished checklists, and learning to trust that time isn’t the enemy. 💫